Honda C90...Bulletproof? My arse

...please excuse punctuation...another dodgy foreign keyboard...pictures coming soon...

Bullet

For the first time in the history of this blog...the voice of  Kev...

"I was going slow uphill so Scott could keep up and too fast downhill so Scott could not keep up ...NOT...
but then I realized that the petrol gauge was going down quicker than I was moving. I looked down and noticed petrol leaking down my leg and over the spark plug:.
I pulled over; had a fag; tightened up the screws on the carb and realised I left the locktite with the guide book.
Damn.
Carried on for another 10km. Scott went ahead without me and as he had no mirrors he did not notice me on the side of the motorway.
Again.
I took a detour to a national park as I was bored with the motorway* and waited for Scott. Ended up in the town of Palace y Villafranca at the same hotel where Scott had been waiting for me. Stroke of luck.

From the hand of Scott again...

Now I will have to finish the story.

                      Excellent

*Scott: What Kev means is; he got lost. I can tell you this now, as he has had to shoot off rather quickly to the hotel toilet.
If only he went that fast on his C90.

Trigger

Whilst waiting for Kev; riding slowly; I had been pulled over by the fuzz. Heres what happened to me;

They pulled me over and wanted to fine me countless Euros as I did not have the 2 mandatory mirrors on my scooter that they said was required by law. That was their excuse anyway. They refused to talk or understand english.
I think they were jealous that everyone was looking at my scooter and not looking at them on their "manly" motorbikes.

C.H.i.P.s

The 2 cops were giggling in Spanish to each other as they thought of what to write on their "On-the-spot-fine notepad".
I managed to explain in my best Spanglish that my vespa had no mirrors when it was made some 35 years ago.
"Manufacturer no fabricado", I shouted in a spanish accent, whilst pointing to the vespa.
They carefully felt their way around the legshields looking for some kind of bracket but found nothing. I prayed that they did not look under the  handlebars where a bracket could be fitted.
I told them that I had ridden the vespa all the way from the UK through Portugal and Spain on my way to Algerciras, without mirrors.
This made them laugh even more and they had to let me go.
Phew!
I made a hasty get away and went to the nearest town to wait for Kevin. I arrived in Palace A something or other.....? 
A crazy bus driver kept overtaking me and pointing; grinning like a spanish motorbike cop on laughing gas.
I found out he was another vespa freak and he led me to a cheap hotel where I later met up with Kevin again. He had re-appeared!

Re-emerging

Happy
After we had some food; I pulled out a 20 euro note to pay; expecting lots of change; the owner took the lot; then he must have felt guilty he had ripped us off and gave us a "free" glass of ? fairy liquid? So nice...
...NOT...
I awoke to find (eventually) Kevin fixing his carb; again. With loctite this time.
We continued towards Algerciras to catch the ferry to Morocco. Kev was listening to drum n bass on his MP3 player then realised it was not drum n bass at all but his engine banging and knocking.
We got split up again in Jerez de la Frontera.
Kev done his David Blaine vanishing act again; literally about 50 metres away, at the bottom of a hill, on a ring road we were on.

Audience member: "Can you pull a rabbit out of your hat"?

Magician: "No but I can pull a hair out of my bum".

TV
Again I waited...and waited...this time I could easliy turn back to find him, which I did but his trick was so good he had completely vanished; even though 2 seconds ago he was right behind me. His close up work was amazing.
After trying the toy walkie talkies for a while and searching high and low I could not find him.
So what did I do? he he he!
I headed off.
Towards the road we agreed to travel on beforehand.

Candid Camera
I went on the main road which we found out Kev was not allowed on as his bike was considered a toy and not fit for fast roads such as these.
I waited at a cafe; where after 1 hour or 2 Kev pulled up with his C90 banging away like a panel beater on amphetamines. He had to take the back roads reserved for gypsies riding donkeys where he says; and I dont believe a word of it; that he saw 'lots of people fixing vespas on the roadside'.
The original plan when we left the hotel that morning was to head straight for Algerciras. As we could not travel on normal roads we had a choice at the crossroads -
Follow the old peasants road towards Algerciras or ...
take a different road that had a couple of towns on it where we could hopefully find a hotel if needed.

Russ Abbott
In true proffessional explorer style we tossed a coin to decide which road to take. We ended up heading towards a great little town by the name of Alcala de los Gazules and decided to stay there the night. It had taken us 2 days to travel about 100km. We asked an extremely helpful local by the name of Juanma )many thanks Juanma for your expert knowledge; your guided tour and friendship) for a cheap hotel.
It would have been nice to stay a little longer here as it was such a nice town but we wanted to catch that elusive ferry.
I pursuaded Kev that he should at least limp the final 60km to Algerciras so we could get on the ferry and actually make it to Morocco to prove everyone wrong.
Well; thats what we did. It took a couple of hours to travel those last few kilometres but we made it onto the ferry and arrived in Ceuta at around 2pm.
Ceuta is actually a tax free Spanish province, )ah ha ive found the commar key) so it was another 3 or 4 km to the actual Moroccan border and a further 100km to our planned destination of Chefchouean in the Rif mountains.

Funnyfanny
At the actual border we could tell straight away that we were no longer in europe and in a different continent. It had the similar hustle and bustle of some of the asian countries we have both visited before in previous lives.
Mayhem. Languages we did not understand. Not having enough time to read the guide book we managed to buy earler we did not really know what the crack was to get through the border without getting ripped off, which was not so good.

Empty forms to fill in were shoved in our faces.

"Park the bikes here",

"No, move them here",

"No move them there".

Helpful hustlers

Guys clutching documents, telling us we needed to fill them in, then insisting that they fill them in for us. Of course they were going to ask for a small fee to 'help' us. So me being me, I wanted to do this myself.

Meanwhile Kev had a few guys helping him fill in his details. After getting a laser to the head from the medic )checking for  flu we think) I handed in all the nessacary documents to the official. I had no insurance for Morocco )no green card) and the official threw the papers back at me,
" No Insurance".
Damn. What to do? I was told by my insurers that I would have to buy insurance on the border. After asking a few people at the border I was told that this was no longer possible.
What to do?

Itchy brown eye
Kev in the meantime was at another kiosk doing the same thing )he also had no green card/insurance but the official didnt seem to notice and he had his papers stamped and went straight through.
Of course I then rapidly went to the same kiosk, got my papers stamped and also went straight through. Unfortunatly the guy who helped Kev did not like me (as I filled out the forms myself and did not give him any money).
He called me a, "Bad man".
This little "hustler" also knew I did not have any insurance and threatened to tell the border officials this before I managed to enter Morocco.
"Ok.You win. How much do you want"? I said.
"10 Euros", was the reply.
I retalliated, "10 for that, you must be mad".
We agreed on 5 Euros. I only had a 20 euro note but he politely gave me 15 euros change and  I promptly got on my scooter and was about to ride off quick. The alternative was to leave the scooter at the border with Kev, jump in a taxi with this little hustler )I use the word 'hustler' lightly) and drive 35km to get insurance. No chance.

No chance

Then next, the border official  who was checking that the papers were stamped correctly etc noticed something was wrong with my documents.
Uh-oh!
All the time Kev had been patiently waiting just 10 metres away in Morocco proper, on his C90 ready to go.
"Where did you get these papers stamped"? asked the border official.
I had to lead him to the booth where I got the papers stamped, fearing the worst.
Would I actually be allowed into Morocco after riding 2500km to get this far?
Would I have to go to the nearest town in a taxi to Tetouan, to get insurance at an extortionate rate?
Will we make it to the town of Chefchouean in time for supper?
Will Kevs C90 go any further?
Will I ever find out where the "open bracket" - )) is on this keyboard?
Tune in next week to find out this and more in the next episode of A Long Lay Down.

Let the games commence

Fun
Now the fun and games commence as we left for Morocco on 3rd Dec 2009. Me, still on my trusty Vespa  and Kev, finally joining me on his Honda C90. So far on this journey nothing of interest has happened to me, Kev, his van or the scooter.

Boring

On the Vespa, I ve travelled just over 2000km, averaging around 333km a day, riding for about 4 or 5 hours a day, likewise with Kev in his nice warm van, listening to his stereo, smoking tabs and that.
But now, with Kev ditching his van in Luz and finally getting on his C90, things start to get a little more interesting.

Games
In Luz, at Johns villa where we stayed for a week or so....many thanks to John by the way for letting us use his place...Kev transformed the place into a mini Mike Bavins ( a local motorbike workshop) and had his C90 up on a makeshift platform to prepare his bike.
Modifications included changing the oil 3 times,
stripping the carb a few times,
fitting a grill on the headlight which he later decided to take off in the end.
He also had another C90 there which was used for spares which I believe once belonged to Tom who is off on yet another C90 from  John O Groats  to Lands End sometime next year. Catch up with him  here  http://www.jogle.co.uk/ 

Olympic
I also decided to get my scooter up on the platform to change the oil and prepare the vespa. I changed the oil as planned, checked the nuts and bolts were all tight etc which they were.
I did not really know what else to do to it as it was running fine.
I wiped off the bugs that were splattered across the front.
What I did end up doing was bending the front mudguard getting it off the platform.
Nevermind. Probably the first of many knocks and scrapes to come.
A few days later, as I was sure there must be something I could do to the scooter to make it a little better, I decided to clean the cylinder head and piston which I found out was built up with coke.
Whoopee!
That was that.

Marathon
So we set off for Morocco. Spain is only about 30km from where we were staying in Portugal so our aim was to get at least to the other side of Seville and if the going was good and if we had time, head straight for the ferry at Algerciras which was an ambitious +500km ish away

Ambitious

Snickers
We left Luz de Tavira in Portugal at 12pm on 3rd Dec.
After 50km, in Spain, about 1 hour into what I would class as the start of the trip, I pulled over on the side of the road to see Kev with his toolkit out, holding a screwdriver and shaking his head.
Oh dear. So soon already?
His carb was coming loose and was leaking petrol if he went over 70kmph.
We soon got going again and making our way to Seville. My scooter did not enjoy going so slow, especially uphill so I overtook him uphill and let him overtake me downhill.
A few kilometres before Seville he did not overtake me.
So I waited....and I waited...and I waited...
Hmmmm? He could not have been that far behind but I could not see him.
I think his carb must still be playing up. I had to keep moving as we were on a motorway and those Spanish motorcycle cops I kept seeing needed some money to buy their kids Xmas presents. So I carried on at a very slow speed towards the road we agreed to meet on should something like this happen.

Knackers
I will leave you all in suspense now as I need some food and a coffee. Tomorrow, if Kev has had time to write anything for me to type into this blog, I will tell the rest of the story. It is getting more interesting believe me.

Au revoir
mange tout, mange tout

Bon Dias

Morning campers

Let sleeping bags lie

Destination
We have reached our first destination of Luz de Tavira near Faro on the south coast of Portugal.
There was a head wind all the way down to the Algarve with the exception of 1 day.
Rain, gale force winds etc seem to have followed us all the way here.
When we arrived in Luz  locals told us its the first rain they´ve had since July. At least its warmer here. T shirt weather during the days.

Moo Moo land
We took a leisurely 4 days to get here  leaving at around 10am each day and setting up camp at around 4 - 5 pm. Nothing too strenuous. We are having a long lay down after all.
We´ve completed almost 2000km so far. (sounds more impressive than miles)

So any problems on the way down?

I had a bird hit me in the face. (Feathered kind) I was going so fast on my vespa it couldn´t get out of the way quick enough.

Lets start with my vespa - I had to change the rear light bulb which I found out from Kev that it had blown in UK.
Thats it.
I gave it a clean yesterday and changed the engine oil ready for Morocco.

Kevs van is also going well. Nothing to report except a dodgy wire in the 'break' light.

Kevs C90 - which he has hardly rode as yet - the broken indicator is now fixed with cellotape due to a few bad cornerings.

Justified
Visited the second highest town in Spain. Had octopus for breakfast which was a first for us both.
So nothing really exciting to report.
We both struggled on the second day in Spain going up and down mountains in heavy rain and strong wind but we lived to tell the tale.
We´re just chillin´ in Luz at the moment. Kev has been busy adding bits to his C90.
Look forward to seeing some of you in Morocco around xmas.
Oh yeh...Kev forgot to bring my guide books of europe and Morocco that I lent him so we have no idea of where we are going or staying and I cannot learn the basic phrases I was hoping to learn whilst here. Handy! He also forgot his duvet!
All in all we are in good spirit.

Ancient

And we're off

Due to Health and Safety reasons the picture has had to be removed.

A quick one while I'm still here. Here's me checking everything straps on to the scoot. I may be doing a few wheelies but should be ok.

We're off today. Sorry no pictures of Kevs C90 but they will be uploaded asap.

Quick up date.

We arrived at Portsmouth 3.45pm.

Kev smoked about 100 fags watching me getting blown around.

Head winds meant I had top speeds of between 40mph and 65mph in the slip stream of passing lorries.

Got pulled over by customs getting onto the boat but they let us through ok. Phew! Its going to be one hell of a journey.

Robbie Villiams is letting himself entertain us on the ferry. 

Gale force winds etc.

It could potentially be the end of the trip.

Time to get spannered.

See you all when we get back

Very windy but no rain and its quite mild for the time of year. Can't have everything!

Bhoom Shiva!

3 days to go

Ready 

We're almost ready.

These are the machines ready for adventure.

Kevs C90 has a new light weight front mudguard which effortlessly paints a perfect straight line of road water on to his face. The legshields have been removed, bulletproof rear carriers added, new indicators and a new paint job. A superb all terrain vehicle.

Steady

Here's the Vespa ready to go. 

In the last 2 months it has had 2 engines,

4 engine rebuilds,

1 puncture and 

1 seizure. (Most of these set backs were because I didn't know what I was doing during the 'restoration'). It also has a rear carrier fitted. Optional extras include a 12volt battery which runs 2 x horns and a cigarette lighter socket. I've also added Goop to my tyres as I am prone to the odd puncture.

Go!

Its going to be interesting to see what and how much we can load onto these machines.

In previous lives I've managed to transport 3 people, 50kg vegetables + passenger, car batteries, gas bottles, chickens and goats on a Vespa (not all at once)! but that was a little bit more than the law will allow.

I've not had much experience on a C90 so I do not know what they are capable of but I believe anything is possible.

Both of these machines are capable of going anywhere, it all depends on the riders skill, judgement and sheer stupidity as to how far and where they can actually go.

Cheggers Plays Pop

"Ta-ra!"

So where are we going?

Scooter

Many people have asked us where we are going - Answer - Morocco via Spain and Portugal.

I will be riding my scooter all the way to Morocco from Diss. Kev will be taking his C90 in his van to Portugal and then from there, we will both be riding via Spain to various places in Morocco; Marrekesh, Essaouira, Casablanca etc.

Ferry

This trip first takes us to Portsmouth to catch the ferry to Bilbao, Spain. We may visit Southampton on the way to Portsmouth, depending on my scooters performance and the time. This ferry is the only thing we have booked in advance.

And then?
Arrive at Bilbao after 2 days. Then, heading west, follow the coast until we reach Portugal. Keeping to the coast we plan to end up in southern Portugal where we will stay for a week or two, resting, drinking beer, preparing Kevs C90 for the beginning of his 2 wheeled adventure, drinking more beer, eat food, smoke tabs.

And then?

And then we will both be riding towards Algeciras in Spain to catch the ferry to Morocco.

Roxy Music

And then?

And then ride around Morocco until;

a) our money starts to run out

b) our petrol runs out

c) our puns run out

d) our patience begins to run out

And then?

Engines

Decided

There hasn't been much written lately as we have not decided which route to take. We only have a rough plan which will develop as we get closer to our destination. We've also been busy at work so we can actually fund the trip. Until recently there has been very little preperation.
With the exception of riding around and blowing up 2 x engines.

Lately both Kev and myself have been busy. Last Saturday Kev was booked in to take his CBT (Cumpulsory Basic Training for motorcycles).
As he was taking his test on his C90 he had to fit a few things back on it, such as
legshields,
new exhaust,
'L'oser plates.
A new K and N air filter was also fitted.
A quick tune up by 2-stroke wizard Simon Venturi and it was ready for the test the next day.

I'm pleased to say Kev and Simon passed their CBT and now Kev is legally on the road!
He's been ripping up the tarmac and doing do-nuts in the dark.
A few tweaks to the clutch and indicators, take off the legshields, add one Kev and he's away!

Hit the road

Delagered

As for me, I've had the 'new' engine back and have done a few hundred miles running it in again as it's had new bearings and seals etc. Thanks go to Antony at Buzzsolomoto for getting me an engine when I needed one and to Sausage and Ian for an excellent and super fast re-build.

This engine is nowhere near as fast as my previous, standard Rally 200 engine (when it was running). I get a top speed of just below 60mph if I'm lucky.

Not good. I was hoping for a cruising speed of at least 60mph.

I found out that the later Spanish P200 engines are more restricted than earlier Rally 200 engines.

So I too wanted my machine to go that little bit faster and decided to change my carb.
I took the scoot for a test ride and then it died.
Siezed.
It is deceased.
It is no more.
I pushed it home with my head held low. (I'm getting the practice in).

So what happened? After I pulled the engine apart I discovered that a vagrant washer had managed to lodge its way in between the crankcases and the crankshaft and made a nice snug home for itself, siezing the crank.

No time to cry. I took a quick trip to Beedspeed in Grimsby for some spares yesterday (new crank and bearings etc) and am pleased to announce my temperamental scooter is now running again. All thats left is to take it for a long test run tomorrow to find out if its going to make it to Morocco.

Snakebite and Black

I originally started this blog with the heading 'Vespa or C90, who will break down first?'
I should have written, 'C90 or Vespa, which will be ready first?'
I thought my Vespa project would be simple enough. All I wanted was a standard Vespa Rally 200 engine in a standard Vespa Rally 200 frame and ride it to Morocco. Oh yeh, and back again. I keep forgetting that bit.
Hopefully, having all these problems at 'home' will mean that I won't get any when I'm 'on the road'.
On the positive side, the optional extras I've fitted, a 12volt battery to power 2 x 'windtone' horns and a cigarette lighter socket (to charge my mobile phone) are all fully functional.
A loud horn is a must in any country.

Cocktail

A few days ago we went out on the road together for the first time and I'm suprised just how fast the C90 is.
I'm also suprised just how slow my Vespa is.
Thankfully for me, I'm a little quicker than the Kev on his C90. I can just keep up with the C90 when I'm going flat out in 3rd gear but when I change to 4th gear I don't have much more top speed, although it allows me just enoough to slowly overtake Kev, grin and give him the finger.

Now Kev has fitted a larger front sprocket to his C90 which made me nervous as I thought he maybe faster than me but we are yet to find out as working for a living seems to get in the way of important stuff like riding around all day.
Next I'm going to try a donated sports exhaust to see what difference it makes to my top speed. I can't have a C90 overtaking me!
If fitting the new exhaust proves a success I'm guessing  a new carb will find its way onto Kevs bike.
To retaliate that means I will then have to fit a performance kit and maybe add some faster gearing to mine.
I then imagine Kev will fit nitrous oxide boosters to catch me up again. I may then add a go faster flame design to mine. That should add an extra 20 mph to the top speed.
Trouble is, I know Kev's been eyeing up a super quick 125cc Thumpstar engine. Watch out Venturi!

Tom Cruise

If I ever get this engine, or even better, the other original one working again, I will then try to load everything I will be taking with me onto the scoot and take it for another test ride. Things such as tent, sleeping bag, small mattress (Winter sale now on), clothes etc.
Exactly what I end up taking will depend on how much stuff will fit into my bags. I plan to lay out everything I want to take in front of me and then get rid of half of it. Usually works.